Journal Entry: Unrest

So much unrest happening in our world today. Riots happening in the South and Mid-West due to racism and police brutality. It would be wonderful for people to look past racial differences, to respect one another, but unfortunately we are unable to do so.

I've always been able to look past color. My Puerto Rican family is of mixed race (my grandmother being a black Puerto Rican, my grandfather being of fair complexion). People would look at my family and stare in surprise when I would introduce my grandmother. I always found that very amusing.

Prejudice was introduced to me at a young age. I recall walking home with my mom, and we passed by two little girls. I smiled at them, since that's what six year olds do, but the girl just gave me a look and said to her friend, 'that white girl just smiled at me', and kept on walking. She never smiled back.

I felt confused, turned to my mom and asked why she called me that. My mom replied, 'people say that to each other sometimes, when they look different'. While I'm a Puerto Rican with light skin, I never thought of myself as 'White', since that what my family would say that about the famous people on television.

As I got older, I continued to witness people saying rude comments about one another. I would hear stories from my grandfather about how life was in Paterson long ago, how neighbors were friendly to each other, then just decided to leave when 'people like us' began moving in. I would take in all of these stories and be in disbelief. How could people hate each other because they looked different? My biracial family taught me that differences in skin color should be embraced!

All the shootings, the violence against each other because of race, must end now. The fact that we're still fighting about race and ethnicity in 2016 is still heartbreaking. We need to look past our differences and learn from one another.

09/24/2016

Journal Entry: Breaktime Musings

Afternoon during break, drinking coffee. Since I work with toddlers, this is the only time during my work day that I can truly relax. It helps that the staff lounge is next to a classroom playing naptime music, the calming aura helps. Perhaps it might make me sleep too, but that hasn't happened yet.

For now I'm just checking email and reading Facebook drama postings. How people are tired of reading about celebrity couples divorcing (I could care less about Brad and Angelina), and who's feuding in the goth/industrial music world (too many strong personalities clashing with each other). It's all entertainment to me.

During my breaks four years ago, I would Facebook group chat with 3 other people: two I reconnected with from college, and another whom I met at a birthday party. We kept in contact after the gathering, celebrating birthdays and holidays together. My hour would be filled with laughter and weird stories from these friends. This trio became a lifeline for me after a breakup and move to Manhattan. By reaching out to these friends during my breaks and other moments of free time, I learned to heal. I'm now deeply close with one of these friends, but I'll go into that later!

Break is almost done, now to quickly check email before I return to my little ones. Another lovely day, and taking them outside sounds so ideal.

09/21/2016

Journal Entry: Relaxation and baseball

A moment to myself, unwinding after a long work day. I'm finally doing what I love, yet the work setting is not the most ideal. Despite the challenges, I'm glad it gave me the opportunity to move out of Northern NJ. I lived in a nice neighborhood, yet there was no growth for me there. My former living situation left me in an awkward position with family members. Lots of negative energies whenever I came home. I no longer deal with that, which is a relief.

Now it's the process of getting my creativity off the ground. Feel comfortable with what I can do, and florish while handling a full time work schedule.

Tonight, I'm watching the Mets game. They're turning out to have a good season, even with all the injuries they've endured. It's already been a dramatic week in baseball...there was a West coast game that had a good bench-clearing moment. Too bad that it was a West coast game...living in New Jersey, I was already fast asleep when it happened!

#LGM 🍎

09/20/2016

Journal Entry: May 4 2016

Three good things about today:

1) I listened to Chevelle today to cheer myself up. Music brings peace to my soul.

2) I kept a nervous child company during After Care at work. We played a couple of card games.

3) One of my students shared with me a project she made last night. It contained the colors of spring.

05/04/2016

Journal Entry: May 3rd, 2016

Three positive things that happened today:

1) I helped one of my students gather materials for an activity during recess. She also learned some facts about nature.

2) I continued my job search, even after receiving news that would have discouraged me in the past.

3) I spoke to a close friend this morning. It was brief, I'm grateful to have that time with her.


05/03/2016

January 20, 2015

It certainly feels great to write in 'Weaving Poetic Threads' once again. I can't believe that I haven't posted here in 6 months! Many things have taken place in my life since that time, early in 2014 in fact. I wish I could say that they were positive things, yet the majority of the events were not. 2014 was certainly a very challenging year, and it forced me to confront things about myself in a monumental way. These past few months have caused me re re-evaluate my goals in life. Despite the struggles, I am eternally grateful for my family, my wonderful boyfriend, my dear friends in my poetry therapy community, and close friendships I've maintained through the years.

I made a promise to myself to strengthen my creative spark in 2015! I'm hard at work in writing my second poetry book, which (hopefully) should be ready this summer. I'm also planning on restarting my poetry therapy group! It will be in New Jersey, and the location needs to be worked out. Running a poetry therapy group brought me much joy when I lived in New York, and I can't wait to have that experience once again.

I hope everyone is enjoying their week! I look forward to sharing more poetry with you soon.


--Cathleen
01/20.2015

My first book, 'A Blossoming Journey', is available here:
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/blossoming